Change has been sitting outside my window for months
With his matted messy hair
Creased shirt and undone tie
and
Bitten nails and lips caused the anxiety that drips from his pores looking for an out

I’ve kept my door bolted ever since I first saw him
I check it every night
And on some, I add another lock on the door to be safe

I don’t want to be surprised in the morning
Waking up to him in my living room
With a leg lazily strewn over the edge of the sofa and drool ruining my favorite seat cushion

Not because he’s terrible or anything
New roommates just scare me
In just about the same way surprises do
Because I need plans
Things set and ready for me
I’d prefer if there was no place of anxiety to come in and make mess

Every time I see Change outside an open window
Sitting on that bench near the street he’s made his home
He waves and smiles
He’s quite friendly really
His past roommates have said he could turn  your life around

But people like him tend to scare me if I were to be honest
I’m comfortable where I am
With the life I have

I remember when my current roommate told me she was going to move out
A part of me knew that Change would be moving in
With his big suitcases
And stubborn ways
I expected to lose the comfort I had created for myself

My roommate didn’t know when she was leaving though
Nothing was set in stone
I suppose that gave Anxiety just enough place to squeeze into the whole uncertain mess
 He made friends with Change
They both sit on the bench outside waiting for their time to move in
They’d gotten some false alarms in the past few months
My roommate thought she’d leave that afternoon and the second the thought struck her
The pair had barged through my front door
Only to be kicked out again the next day


It gets confusing for all of us
I’d rather have life the way it is
Not because the pair is terrible or anything
New roommates just scare me.

-29/07/2016; 4:25pm

Advertisements